Letting Go and Flying

This weekend I had an experience that I've never had before. Getting off work Sunday morning I walked out into the cold knowing only 2 things. First, I was determined to run 8 miles, and second that I was going to put my sweet husband first for once and sneak home earlier than expected to get some cuddle time in.

I headed up to park my car and mouthed a silent word of thanks to God for the sunrise that was blazing across the morning sky in shades of pink and purple that no photograph can ever seem to capture properly.

 I pounded pavement for an hour and fifteen then headed over to the gym to train back and shoulders. Already, a perfect morning for me! Sometime after the pull-ups and the Arnold presses and the music in my ears driving me hard, a feeling washed over me that I am still, three days later, struggling to express without feeling really lame. It was like an endorphin rush only better.

Out of nowhere I saw myself, really saw ME. Looking in that gym mirror I suddenly found myself overwhelmed by a sense of peace, gratitude, pride and joy about WHO I am, WHERE I am and WHAT I am doing with my life. It was as if God said, "Enough, woman. I'm tired of you filtering your view of yourself through what you aren't, where you THINK you should be and the expectations of some invisible "they"."

     You know what? It was glorious. It was the most freeing feeling that I have ever had in my life, and as silly as it sounds I will do anything that I can to maintain or strive for that level of freedom for the rest of my life. That's the voice of God. That's the heavenly father looking at me and letting me see me how he sees me, how my husband sees me, how I SHOULD see me. That's what we all should experience. Instead of always looking to the media or other external sources I would pray that all of the people I love could see themselves as they truly are.

God doesn't make junk. He just doesn't. Armed with that knowledge has had me flying high ever since Sunday morning!

As for the rest of the day? It was just as big a gift. We had lunch with at Mom's with my Step-dad, Brother and sister in law that lead to my SIL and I signing up for aerial silks (more later!).  We FINALLY bottled our beer. 

And the best part? I ended the day in the arms of the man that I love, slow dancing in the kitchen to our song while I sang in his ear and when I kissed him there were tears in his eyes. This is what happens when we let love in. This is what happens when GOD takes control of our hearts. This is why I'm grateful. I am learning how to fly.